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2025 NFL Season Preview: NFC North
- Matt Talmage
- Aug 19
- 7 min read
Will 2024's best division in football remain the class of the league?
Green Bay Packers
Highlight From Last Season
Probably Christian Watson's 150-yard game against the Bears in Week 11. His 60-yard catch and run in the fourth quarter set up the Packers' go-ahead touchdown.
That performance put the Packers in position to steal their only divisional win of the season on this crazy blocked field goal as time expired.
Lowlight From Last Season
The year was neatly bookended by misery at the hands of the Eagles. It opened in Brazil on turf that looked less like a football field and more like the surface of the moon. Jordan Love sprained his MCL on the final drive, an injury that lingered all year and, as a bonus punishment, forced the football world to endure Malik Willis starts. That alone could make the reel of lowlights.
Eighteen weeks later, the Eagles reared their bald heads again in the Wild Card round. The Packers promptly fumbled the opening kickoff, and the game was essentially over before the cheese had even melted on my nachos.
Biggest Offseason Storyline
The headline move was adding speedster Matthew Golden to an already stacked wide receiver group. Golden blazed a 4.29 in the 40-yard dash — the fastest of any receiver and second fastest of any player at the combine. Now he joins a lineup that already features Jayden Reed, Christian Watson, Romeo Doubs, and Dontayvion Wicks, giving Jordan Love an arsenal of explosive options that can stretch defenses in every direction.
QB Situation
Jordan Love, Malik Willis, Sean Clifford, Taylor Elgersma
It was easy to poke fun at Love getting a $55 million contract before he even had 10 career wins — the jokes practically wrote themselves on a blank sheet of computer paper. But sarcasm aside, the Packers have (another) legitimate franchise quarterback (again) in Love. With a healthy MCL and an embarrassment of riches on offense, he should look far more comfortable this season.
The concern? Depth, or rather the complete lack of it. If Love misses time, Malik Willis is the contingency plan — which is about as solid a plan as my 3-year-old’s strategy for hide-and-seek: standing in the middle of the room with her eyes closed. For a roster that looks otherwise loaded, it’s fair to question why GM Brian Gutekunst left the backup spot untouched. If Love goes down, the season might go with him.
2025 Prediction | Over 9.5 wins
As a purely spiteful Packers hater, it pains me to say it. But this team is really good. If they get even average injury luck, they are probably one of the only NFC teams that can give the Eagles a run for their money.
Chicago Bears
Highlight From Last Season
Firing Matt Eberflus on Black Friday.
Lowlight From Last Season
This clock mismanagement master class on Thanksgiving.
Honorable mention: DJ Moore walking off the field mid-play.
Offseason Storyline
Ben Johnson, the NFL media's favorite offensive coordinator during his stint with the Lions, is now the head coach in Chicago. Will he be able to replicate the success he had in Detroit? To get close, he'll need a big leap out of his quarterback Caleb Williams... who has been doing stuff like this at training camp.
So yeah. Let's go ahead and tap the breaks on the Bears offense.
QB Situation
Caleb Williams, Tyson Bagent, Case Keenum, Austin Reed
See above.
2025 Prediction | Under 8.5 wins
The case for the over isn’t crazy. Ben Johnson feels like an automatic upgrade over Matt Eberdoofus, and if Caleb Williams makes a sophomore leap, he’ll have real weapons to work with in DJ Moore, Rome Odunze, Luther Burden, and Cole Kmet. The offensive line should also be better after offseason reinforcements.
The question is whether anyone in the backfield can actually capitalize on those upgrades. Betting on Caleb Williams and D’Andre Swift to carry the load still feels shaky. So if pressed, the lean is to the under — but it’s not a lock.
Minnesota Vikings
Highlight From Last Season
This 97-yard touchdown from Darnold to Jefferson. If you look closely, you can see Taranis hypnotizing the San Francisco secondary.
Honorable mention: Andrew Van Ginkel getting a pick six off of both New York teams in the same season. I'm not sure if that's ever happened before and Google's AI overview just keeps summarizing the plot of Rip Van Winkle, so I'm just going to assume it was the first time.
Lowlight From Last Season
Sam Darnold became just the third quarterback in NFL history to be sacked nine times in a playoff game, getting housed harder than a slice of hot bread in a Manayunk row house. His performance was so disastrous that the Vikings decided they’d rather roll into this season with an untested rookie than stick with the guy who had just led them to a 13-3 record. That’s not just a lowlight — that’s what we call in the marketing biz a "career rebrand".
Offseason Storyline
Everyone knows from looking at his dopey face that Kevin O’Connell is the NFL’s most obnoxious crypto bro. While J.J. McCarthy rehabbed his injury, O’Connell reportedly met with him weekly to “keep him involved with the team,” which translated into hours of portfolio talk. The two allegedly decided to “buy the dip” on Fartcoin, rode it to a six-figure profit, and are now reinvesting their windfall in state-of-the-art VR headsets to run practice simulations and, naturally, a blockchain-based playbook nobody asked for.
QB Situation
J.J. McCarthy, Sam Howell, Brett Rypien, Max Brosmer
No one really knows what to expect here. J.J. McCarthy returns from injury still looking like my sixth-grade science camp counselor who stole the fetal pigs, covered them in Fun Dip, and stashed them in his underwear drawer. Still, when he shuts up for five minutes about how he “got in early on ETH”, Kevin O’Connell can scheme up a pretty decent offense. I'm not betting on McCarthy for Rookie of the Year, but the NFL has produced stranger outcomes.
2025 Prediction | Under 8.5 wins
Last year, I infamously predicted they would have the worst record in the NFL. Instead, they went 13-3. So you probably shouldn't listen to me. I'm fading them though.
Detroit Lions
Highlight From Last Season
That Week 18 win over Minnesota lost some shine once Sam Darnold turned into a beanbag chair in the playoffs, but in hindsight it was still a statement. Detroit gashed a tough Vikings defense, with Jahmyr Gibbs ripping off four second-half touchdowns in a 31–9 beatdown. The win locked up the NFC’s top seed and gave the Lions their first-ever sweep of the North—no small feat in what went down as the most successful single-season division in NFL history by combined winning percentage.
Lowlight From Last Season
Jared Goff airmailing this pass — one of three interceptions in their Divisional Round game against the Commanders. They lost the game outright by two touchdowns as a 10-point favorite. Yuck.
Offseason Storyline
Both coordinators bolted for head coaching jobs. Former OC Ben Johnson now runs the division rival Bears, while former DC Aaron Glenn joined the Jets (god help him). Depending on who you ask, this is either no big deal (because Dan Campbell could motivate this team to run dick-first through a concrete wall) or the end of civilization, (because football nerds' dicks get harder than a concrete wall when they talk about these guys).
Only time will tell. But imagine being the type of Redditor who spends four paragraphs and seventeen charts debating this while surrounded by empty cans of Celsius.
QB Situation
Jared Goff, Hendon Hooker, Kyle Allen
I didn't know you're website was still online. You've been quieter than Joe Biden's voice at the 2024 debate. And speaking of ineffective, I'm still smiling about Jared Goof's meltdown in the Divisional Round last season. That no-good cyberbully deserves every tipped pass, forced fumble, and bone-rattling sack that comes his way. Tony from the plant's niece has had a terrible summer thanks to the post-traumatic stress or some other psychobabble caused by that miscreant. Promising future, gone. Now she can barely give a manicure at cosmetology school without breaking down if the client's got small hands. You ever see someone sob into a paraffin wax bath? Tony has! And it’s Goof's fault. The poor girl deleted every app on her phone except for BetterHelp, and even then, this doofus hacked her account and and changed her virtual background to a stock image of a port-a-potty for her online therapy appointment. That ain’t football. That’s terrorism with Wi-Fi. And don’t get me started on this “highlight or lowlight ” mumbo jumbo. The man threw five interceptions in one game. FIVE. Put a little lead in my pencil watching that train wreck. And then, somehow, he won. Only in this sick league could you play like a hungover substitute teacher, still get the W, and have people clap for you. Moron. You know what annoys Goof? Common decency. You know what annoys me? The fact he’s still allowed in public. He should be in Alligator Alcatraz for this laundry list of shame: the fake Tinder profile, the Craigslist skin flute lessons, the “Lead Diarrhea Researcher at Imodium Labs” LinkedIn hack. Guy thought a non-alcoholic IPA was “surprisingly decent” — that alone should get you deported. And don’t think I forgot he brought his dog to CVS. To CVS! He’s got a stupid little face, tiny little hands, and the personality of a guy who tells the drive-thru pharmacist his entire medical history. Jared Goof, if your reading this, go play “Stairway to Heaven” at Guitar Center and stay their. Matt, do you want to come over for dinner later? Susie is making beef stroganoff and Colin won't eat it because he says eating meat is like chewing on Mother Earth's heartbeat. I'll give that whiny hippie something to chew on! Regards, Uncle Jack
2025 Prediction | Under 9.5 wins
I'm gonna be that guy who fades the fun team everyone wants to root for. Generally, this is a solid moneymaking strategy. Like playing the Don't Pass line at the craps table. You can hate me all you want. I'll be at the Grand Lux Café eating steak and eggs and counting my purple chips.
